The essentials
- Two routes: divorce by mutual consent, when everything has been agreed in advance, and contested divorce, where a judge decides point by point.
- Steps: a signed agreement (with lawyers or before the registrar, depending on the country) or an application to the family court; as soon as there is disagreement, a lawyer is compulsory in most countries.
- Timescales: a few weeks to a few months for a divorce by consent; one to three years, sometimes more, when it is contested; many countries require a period of separation first.
- Cost: lawyers' and notaries' fees rather than court fees; the bill rises with the level of disagreement, not with the procedure chosen; legal aid exists almost everywhere, subject to means.
- Children: parental responsibility normally stays shared; the court settles where the children live, the time spent with each parent and child maintenance, on the basis of the child's best interests.
- Money: winding up the property regime, the family home, and possibly maintenance between former spouses.
- Where to go: a family lawyer, family mediation, the family court; for an international couple, check first which court has jurisdiction.
Fault or breakdown
The older approach requires a ground that one spouse must prove — adultery, desertion, cruelty. The newer one asks only whether the marriage has irretrievably broken down, usually presumed after a period of separation. The movement has been in one direction for decades: away from fault. That changes more than procedure. Where no blame has to be proved, the incentive to build a case against the other person disappears.
The waiting period nobody plans for properly
Nearly every system imposes a separation or waiting period. What matters is when it starts: on moving out, on a formal separation order or agreement, or only when the application is filed. Some systems accept factual separation, even under one roof; others count only a formal step. Getting this wrong routinely costs a full year. Uncontested procedures are substantially faster almost everywhere.
Money: three questions to keep separate
First, division of property, which follows the matrimonial regime rather than a case-by-case sense of fairness. Second, spousal maintenance, which is shrinking everywhere and is increasingly framed as transitional support towards independence. Third, child support, which belongs to the child rather than the resident parent and therefore cannot be traded away or waived.
Children: welfare is the only test
No system decides parenting by reference to who caused the marriage to fail. The test is the child's welfare, applied through continuity, existing attachments and each parent's willingness to support the child's relationship with the other. A parent who systematically obstructs contact damages their own position almost everywhere.
Before you move out
Moving out is where most avoidable harm happens. Copy every document about income, accounts, loans and insurance first, record the date of separation in writing, and check whether leaving affects your rights in the family home. These three steps cost nothing and decide a great deal later.
The law country by country
The legal framework, the procedure, the time limits and the costs differ from one country to another. Each country below has a detailed page: governing texts, key facts, the actual procedure, costs, where to go and the traps to avoid.
Select a country to open its detailed page.
