Three situations, not two
The question is usually framed as a yes or a no. In practice, every couple falls into one of three situations, and the difference between them is considerable.
| Marriage open | The same rules as for everyone else: same conditions, same effects, same certificate. That is the position in some forty states, mainly in western Europe, the Americas and Oceania, together with South Africa, Taiwan, Thailand and Nepal. |
|---|---|
| Alternative status | A registered union, a civil partnership, a cohabitation contract: something exists, but it is not marriage, and the gap almost always falls in the same places — parenthood, adoption, sometimes inheritance or nationality. |
| Nothing, or worse | No recognition at all; and in around sixty countries same-sex relations remain criminal offences, up to life imprisonment or the death penalty in a small number of states. |
A binational couple can sit in all three at once: married in one country, holding a downgraded status in a second, at risk in a third. That is what the country pages on this page are for.
Which door the change came through
There are only three routes, and each leaves a lasting mark on the national argument.
- Through the courts. A constitutional or supreme court holds that exclusion breaches equality. The change is quick, and is often attacked afterwards as undemocratic.
- Through parliament. The commonest route. Slower, built on compromises — usually over adoption or assisted reproduction, settled later — and more stable for it.
- Through a popular vote. Rare, because risky: putting a minority's rights to the majority can fail. Where it has succeeded it produced the firmest legitimacy — and a campaign whose psychological cost was paid by the people it was about.
What marriage actually changes
Beyond the symbolism, marriage is a bundle of rights that no private contract fully reproduces.
- Inheritance. A spouse inherits as of right, usually with very favourable tax treatment. An unmarried partner, in most countries, inherits nothing and pays the highest rate.
- Immigration. Marriage opens a route to family reunion almost everywhere; alternative statuses are recognised very unevenly by foreign authorities.
- Medical decisions. In hospital a spouse is the obvious point of contact. Without a legal tie it is the family of origin who decides — including against a partner of twenty years.
- Benefits. Survivor's pension, health cover, family leave: most of it is attached to marriage, not to how long you have lived together.
- Separation. Divorce organises the division and protects the weaker party. A break-up outside marriage gives rise to nothing, whatever each person contributed.
Parenthood, where equality often stops
This is where legal systems diverge most, including among countries that have opened marriage. Four questions arise separately, and a country can answer yes to one and no to the next:
- Joint adoption of a child by the couple.
- Step-parent adoption of a partner's child — the most commonly available, and often the first opening.
- The presumption of parenthood: is the wife of the woman who gives birth a legal mother automatically, without having to adopt her own child? Many countries that opened marriage still have not settled this.
- Access to assisted reproduction for female couples, and the much narrower question of surrogacy for male couples.
The unrecognised parent trap
A child can have two legal parents in one country and one in another. The consequences are concrete: travel authorisation, medical decisions, inheritance, parental authority if the biological parent dies. If a move is on the cards, settle this before leaving, with a lawyer in both countries.
Recognition from one country to the next
A marriage validly celebrated somewhere is not automatically a marriage everywhere. Three cases recur:
- Full recognition: the union has the same effects as a local marriage.
- Downgrading: the host country treats it as a lesser status — a civil union where it was a marriage. The effects shrink without the couple signing anything.
- Non-recognition: the union does not legally exist. The couple become two unconnected people, with all that follows for residence, inheritance and care.
One useful nuance: several countries that do not open marriage nonetheless recognise a foreign union for one specific purpose — a spousal visa, joint taxation, hospital visiting — without drawing any further consequence. That functional recognition usually comes from the courts rather than the legislature, and is sometimes won case by case.
Converting a partnership into a marriage
In countries that moved from partnership to marriage, earlier unions do not become marriages automatically: you have to ask. Conversion is generally simple and inexpensive, and sometimes takes effect retrospectively from the date of the partnership — which matters for the length of union that some authorities require. Where both regimes coexist, the choice is no longer legal but personal.
What to prepare, whatever the country
Wherever you are, four documents change a couple's life when things go wrong, and three of them cost a few tens of pounds or euros.
- A will, above all where there is no marriage or where there is international mobility.
- A lasting power of attorney or health care proxy, so that your partner is the person consulted after an accident.
- A written agreement on the home, the accounts and anything bought together.
- Legalised, translated copies of the marriage certificate and of the children's birth certificates, ready before any trip.
Travelling and moving
In a country that criminalises same-sex relations, caution is not discretion: it is a safety measure. Check your foreign ministry's advice before leaving, do not volunteer your situation on an immigration form that does not ask, and be aware that dating apps are a documented vector for arrest and blackmail there.
The law country by country
The legal framework, the procedure, the time limits and the costs differ from one country to another. Each country below has a detailed page: governing texts, key facts, the actual procedure, costs, where to go and the traps to avoid.
Select a country to open its detailed page.
