Trans and gay dating: sites, apps and countries where they are a trap

Apps for gay and bisexual men

Grindr (2009, Los Angeles): the most used in the world, some ten million monthly users, location-based, free with a subscription tier; quick meetings more than relationships, but everything is found there. Its location data has been sold to brokers and its safety is weak in hostile countries (see below).
Scruff (2010): a slightly older, more "bear" crowd, travel and event features; Hornet (2011): strong in Russia, Turkey, Brazil and Asia, with a news feed; Romeo (PlanetRomeo, Berlin, 2002): the historic German- and Dutch-speaking network, also on the web; Recon and Growlr for targeted audiences; Jack'd popular among Black and Latino men in the US.
The generalists — Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, Hinge, Match — offer orientation filters; OkCupid and Tinder have offered dozens of gender and orientation options since 2016–19.

A man checks a dating app on his phone, settled on a sofa in the evening — Settled on a sofa one evening, a man scrolls through a dating app on his phone. Grindr, Scruff, Hornet and Romeo are location-based and free with a paid subscription option; Grindr, the most widely used in the world, has had its location data sold to brokers, and its security remains weak in hostile countries.

For lesbian, bi and queer women

Two women in their thirties chat and laugh at an evening gathering on a lit rooftop terrace — Some apps also organise events in large cities.

HER (2013, San Francisco) is the reference, with events in the big cities; Lex (text personals, no photos), Zoe, Feeld (for non-conventional relationships) and Bumble in women-women mode complete the picture; trans women are admitted depending on the app, and sometimes poorly received.

For trans people and those seeking them

Fiorry (2019): designed for trans and non-binary people, with profile verification and a support community; Butterfly (2019, UK): reserved for trans people and those wishing to meet them, with built-in translation; Taimi (2017): generalist "LGBTQ+", heavily used by trans people; Transdr, Tser, TransSingle and MyTransgenderDate (2014, aimed at lasting relationships, human moderation): niche sites, some of which live off fantasy more than off meeting.
On generalist apps trans women face fetishism (the chasers, who want an experience and hide the relationship) and brutal rejection once their history is known; many state it in the profile to filter, others wait for the first meeting — each her own rule, and no legal obligation to disclose in the UK, US, Canada or Australia.

The countries where the app is a trap

A passenger deletes apps from his phone before landing — Where homosexuality is repressed, the rule starts before the border: no app on the phone, no face photo, no exact location.

Where homosexuality is repressed, police and gangs use the apps to lure, arrest or extort. In Egypt, police officers create fake Grindr profiles to arrest gay men and trans women, prosecuted for "debauchery" (dozens of arrests a year documented by Human Rights Watch); in Morocco in 2020 an outing campaign based on Grindr profiles led to evictions from family homes and suicides; in Nigeria, Ghana, Cameroon, Kenya, gangs (kito) set up a meeting, beat, film and ransom; in Uganda, the 2023 Act carries life imprisonment and denunciation is encouraged; in Russia, since the 2023 ruling declaring the "LGBT movement" extremist, using an app can bring prosecution; in the Gulf states, Iran, Indonesia (Aceh), Malaysia, police run targeted raids; in Jamaica and parts of the Caribbean, ambushes are frequent. Grindr, Hornet and Scruff hide distance and warn users in these countries; it is not enough. Minimum rules when travelling: no app on the phone at the border, no face photo, no exact location, meetings only in public places recommended by trusted people, and the embassy's number. The country pages of Sexual orientation and of Travel give each country's law.

Safety everywhere

A nurse takes a blood sample from a young man at a sexual-health clinic — Regular screening, PrEP and vaccinations: safety also means health, and the apps themselves send reminders of the dates.

Sextortion: an attractive profile obtains intimate images then threatens to send them to family or employer — gay men who are not out and trans people are the first targets. Never pay, cut contact, keep the evidence, report to the platform and the police (Report Fraud in the UK, the FBI's IC3 in the US); images can be taken down via StopNCII.org.
Ambushes: homophobic attacks organised through apps happen in Western countries too (several trials a year in the UK and US); first meeting in a public place, a friend told, location shared.
Outing: screenshots, shared profiles — the risk exists everywhere; caution with recognisable photos and life details.
Health: regular testing, PrEP (free on the NHS since 2020, covered by most US insurance and Medicare, free in Australia and Canada's provinces) and vaccinations; the apps themselves remind users of testing dates.

Text prepared with artificial intelligence, reviewed by the AffectionPlus team (method: About). Spotted an error? Write to us.

Trans and gay dating: the sites and apps, and the countries where they are a trap

Apps for gay and bisexual men

For lesbian, bi and queer women

For trans people and those seeking them

The countries where the app is a trap

Safety everywhere